That's exactly what I did yesterday. I got mad at God! The whole time I was screaming at Him about recent events it was like I was watching myself in 3rd person and all the while not being able to stop myself.
As crazy as it is going to sound, I was upset about spending money on taking my Son to the doctor. Let me say here that I will put my children before myself and get them whatever medical help they need, even medicine for a double sinus infection.
The part I got mad over was the fact that we have spent SO MUCH money these past couple of weeks getting the cars fixed, yup, carS! All this after we moved in September, had a baby, and all the financial expenses that go along with that. So adding another $40.00 copay and prescription cost to that just put me over the edge. And we have to take Asher to the doctor tomorrow for his 4 month checkup; another $40.00 copay. I am just being real here people! It seems lately that the end of the money is getting here before the end of the month. :/
I do not put money above God, but the question I ask myself is why then did/do I react the way I do and be concerned about money, or the lack there of?
I know, even when I get mad and have to ask for forgiveness and thank God that he didn't strike me dead during my "fit throwing", that God is taking care of us. Always has and always will! But lately it just seems that enough is not enough. And yet as I type this I know that I am blessed beyond my greatest imagination.
I am not asking for sympathy from any of you. I just wanted to be real with you! Hey, I can have a bad day too.
1 comment:
You should take the time to read about my "bad" day...I posted it not even knowing that you wrote this so...kinda a funny. I totally understand. In November, we had over 300$ worth of medical bills just for co-pays (also 40$) and mainly because both our kids were having to see a dermatologist...not even for sickness! I was totally ill about it but also, like you, was putting our kids first because otherwise I would not have even seen a specialty doctor.
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